Blueberry preroll from The Healing Canna

First of all, my thoughts go to the firefighters, support services, and evacuees dealing with the Waldo Canyon fire.  Please be safe, peoples.

To my readers:  You can help the situation by being part of the solution instead of part of the problem.  Please watch your sparks and butts.  No cinders out the car windows and if you're outside, please be sure your cinders are extinguished completely before discarding or putting in the trash.  Our firefighters are stretched to the limits.
Growers:  This is a good time to double check your electricals.  Again, I can't grow to save my life, but for those of you who can, if you have a complicated set up, please get a qualified person to look it over.  It's a business expense and its a good time to do it.  Also, watch out for the smoke.

Now, on to my Review!

Blueberry Preroll:

This is a very nice Blueberry.  My stress level is down.  I'm not having any anxiety though my frontal lobe feels numb and also a bit fogged up.

As is true with most Blueberry for me, not having pain or muscle spasms.

I'm not happy so much as just very calm and in a good mood.  I'm certainly not euphoric.
I feel very relaxed and comfortable.  I wouldn't call it lazyness.  I'm having no problems getting up and getting things done, but when I sit down, I don't obsess over my to-do list like I usually do.

I'd say it is uplifting only to the extent that I feel so relaxed and chill.

I could easily see this helping someone with insomnia.

I'm not having any negatives (dry mouth, etc) except a very minor headache behind my eyes, but that could just be the cold I have, so I'll take an advil and all will be well.  I just wanted to wait to take it until I wrote this reviiew, because as you all know, I write these after a good couple/few hits and give them around an hour to fully hit me in a pure way.

The Healing Canna:

Decent location and design.  It feels very much like a medical office in the waiting room.  The MJ room feels like you could be in South Florida, which is fine.  It's a legitimate decor/design and kind of refreshing from the utilitarian designs of most other providers.  Cheers for interior decorating!

I also liked that they weren't paranoid about being robbed and allowed as many people as they could into their MJ area.  Their MJ area is nicely sized and allows a very decent number of people in, so you can browse while they are checking other people out, just like a decent retail store.

Also, the people working there give good attention to each patient and I didn't feel rushed at all, even though there were maybe a half-dozen other people in the MJ room with me.  The other patients were very polite and everyone waited their turn calmly.

Their products are well displayed and easy to price.  Also, I had a very cool coupon from the Independant for a $20 eighth, so very nice marketing.  Cheers!  :-)

The preroll came in decently air-tight tube, so yay for good packaging!
As for their preroll format, the preroll is so thin, I can't use my cigarette holder and it's very adjustable.  I've smoked everything from tiny cigarellos to mini-cigars with it, and if something doesn't fit within reason (or in this case, is simply so loose it just falls out, even when I hold it straight up), then the preroll is NOT reasonably wide in my opinion..

For those of you who are cool with joints and roach clips, the width probably won't bother you.  I just hate unfiltered smoke, my one-hitter being the exception, but that's a matter of mobility.

Cheesequake from Maggie's Farm

Okay, so I sorted out a couple of patients with my apprentice caregiver. She still has room for 3 more people for you patients out there interested in my sort of caregiver service.


Now, on to Cheesequake and Maggie's Farm. :-)

According to the label, Cheesequake is a 55/45 (Sativa/Indica) hybrid.  For any one not familiar with the nomenclature, I'll explain., Sativas tend to give you effects like energy and a cerebral high while Indicas go more for the overall budy buzz.  It can get really complicated scientifically, but that's a reasonable simplification. 

These effects can be negative.  Someone with fear or anger issues may become anxious or even paranoid (if a little unhinged to begin with).  Being old has its advantages.  I've had more time than some to sort myself out and not take what other people think as a reflection on myself.  So, my reviiews are, of course, very subjective to my conditions and stage of life.

For instance, I'm a really poor evaluator of the anxiety side effect of MJ because after much soul-searching (aka therapy), I've dealt with the more severe issues I had and am a much more balanced person now.  So a strain may negatively affect someone else that way without me having any indication.  On the other side, if a strain ever DOES do that to me, then it must be pretty severe on that side effect and most patients should probably stay away from it to be on the safe side.


Cheesequake: 

So, as it so informatively says on the label, this is a 55/45 hybrid.

Typically, Cheesecake should give you the Sativa energy and alertness with the Indica body buzz and relaxation.  http://www.leafly.com/indica/cheese-quake

First thing I felt very soon after using was my frontal lobe got nicely numb.  Your frontal lobe handles your problem solving and thought processes, so I wouldn't use this on a day you need to be fully alert.  That's its kind of cerebral high. 

I also had some healthy dry mouth.

Some Sativas make me think better and others make me fuzzy.  An hour after use, I'm getting some squeezing behind my eyes and my brain feels kind of shielded, but the MJ seems to be moving on to other parts of my brain (temporal lobes atm).  (Others describe that as "fluffy," but I since my brain doesn't feel soft, just very solid behind some nice concertina wire, I won't use that term here.  Maybe someday I'll find a strain that actually makes me feel fluffy, but I'm not holding my breath over it.)

Having a nice body buzz with it, so good for muscle spasms and pain relief.

I'm not feeling anying energy, so I recommend this for a day when you just need to relax (my ROTC instructor used to call those "attitude-adjustment days").  We all need some good relaxation as needed so we can untie the stress knots the world can put into us before they get too complicated, so I can recommend this strain of Cheesequake for that.

That being said, this is kind of interfering with my ability to write this review.  It's taking longer than it should.  I'm feeling kind of dumb and humorless.  The fatigue I'm feeling could lead some patients into depressive feelings, so please be careful.


Maggie's Farm:

Very good labeling.  All strains are clearly identified and some even include info on the effects of the strain.  Good stuff for those new to the MMJ community.  The labels also include the Maggie's Farm logo, so you won't forget where you got it from.  (Good marketing - Cheers!)

Very well planned label, however the fill-in-the blank spots for date, MMR# and batch number were blank.  Now, they also labelled it with the standard computer printed name, dispensary, weight and strain name, so I can appreciate the planning for writing that info on their dispensary label even though the date and MMR# are kind of redundant, so leaving them blank when the vial is labelled on the other side with that info is okay.  But having a blank for the batch number just feels kind of lazy.  Like someone had a great plan for tracking something and then they abandoned the effort.

Strains can vary a bit from batch to batch, so I appreciate them planning to write in what batch it came from as being informative for the more anal retentive patients (like me) who are interested in tracking these things, but leaving it blank shows good intent with no followthrough.

Plastic container isn't air tight and also a bit of trouble to open.  Patients with impaired function in their hands may have difficulty opening them

I appreciated the information about their product being "organic" and grown outside and I'll trust that it's accurate.  I have no green thumb so I can't in good conscience have any preferences about growing inside vs. out, but I know some people do.

Their bags are also labelled with their Maggie's Farm logo.  Nice marketing, but for safety reasons, some people may not feel secure with that.  Get stopped by a cop and having a dispensary name on a product in easy view of the officer you're trying not to get a ticket from isn't great planning.  I'd rather have a nice non-provocative bag, thank you.

They advertised their Sugar Hash (which I think is made with the leftovers from the trimming process as they blend their strains to make it) for 5 grams for $45.  Nice cost-efficient option for patients without financial resources.  I wonder how their Sugar Hash compares with Levity Wellness's Levit-aid Hash. 

Also, having a dispensary at their South Nevada location is definitely a step up from the crappy used-car places that have been there in succession for years.  I think the dispensary is a definite improvement for that piece of real estate and the property values around it, but that's my logic and I know many people in Colorado Springs that way because of that NIMBY quotient.

They take Visa/MC which as you all know I think is better for patient safety and comfort.

One odd thing happened though.  The very lovely ladies treated the weighing like a game show for how fast they could get the perfect 7g weight.  Now, I know I got 1/4, but placing so much emphasis on the perfect weighing when other dispensaries intentionally overweigh their 1/8 and 1/4 and such is kind of a downer.  Again, the weighing is where the dispensary has an interest in giving you what you paid for with as little overage as possible, but I don't think it needs to be shown off.


My two cents:

"Maggie's Farm" was written by Bob Dylan against the "protest" folk musicians who had sold out.  It's a deeply political song about capitalist exploitation. 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maggie's_Farm

Then U2 covered it in 1986 as a protest against Margaret Thatcher's UK/Ireland policies.

There are more versions, but suffice to say, "Maggie's Farm" was always alluded to as a bad thing.  I'm sure either someone there is a fan of Dylan or one of the musicians who covered it, or maybe someone thought the name recognition for marketing outweighed in original negative connotation it has.  

As a name for an MMJ dispensary, it kind of confuses and scares me.  Got some goosepimples going on.

To you all who read these musings:

A few people have seriously wanted to know who I am.  For those of my readers who feel that way, please understand the following: 

I'm just taking care of my friends (aka patients).  We are private people and don't need attention from the wrong sorts.  It would be very easy for law enforcement to message me, ask who I am, and then come for me with a warrant and give us all kinds of grief that we don't need.  I'm sure you can understand my cause for concern.

Second, a few other people have asked if I can take more patients.  So here's the best I can do.  I have a trusted friend who can be a primary caregiver for no more than five (5) people. If you're interested in home (or work) delivery of your medicinal MJ, send me a personal message on my Facebook page (not my personal page please, they'll get lost), https://www.facebook.com/pages/Raise-Your-Bong/210671389053437 and while you're at it, go ahead and give my Facebook Page a Like.  :-)

And btw - Father's Day is SUNDAY!  If your Dad is a camera dude or if your Dad's an asshole and YOU are a camera-loving dude, maybe its a good time to get a gift, for your Dad or yourself (if your father doesn't deserve such a thing).  It should be called Dad's Day instead of Father's Day.  Pretty much any sperm donor can be a father, it takes a GOOD father to be a Dad.

So Cheers to all you DADS out there!

/inhale - and comment /inhale if you're with me on this!

Mystery MJ by Broadmoar Wellness

I've had a busy few days, so I hadn't planned on writing a review today, but decided I could review the MJ with the three word name that started with a B from Broadmoor Wellness  Since they stuck the labels to the receipt (which is lost in the clutter of paper on my desk, or in my car, or stuck to something that was once on the kitchen table), I cannot honestly tell you the name of this strain.

Buuut, I'm going to review it anyway, because it is a quality hybrid.  So Broadmoor Wellness, whatever you sold me an 1/8 of that has the 3 word name that starts with a B, get off your keester and grow more of it.  Well done.

Mystery hybrid MJ named B_____________   ________________    ______________:

Problem solving catalyst!  There's no problem I can't solve right now. 

Add in the awesome activity level and energy to get things done, and I am a more fully functing human being.  Hooray!

It has slight dry mouth that'll make you keep yourself hydrated.  So healthy annoyance.

Mood is elevated.  I can solve any problem in my life right now and that's a really good confident feeling.

Now, this has aspects of the Sativas, but it's a Hybrid!  It also has aspects of the Indicas.  I'm having a nice body buzz atm.  Having a nice body buzz without it being ruined by fatigue or fogginess in the brain. 

Best of all worlds tried so far for my conditions medicinally.

It's going to give you energy, so this is definitely a "daytime" strain.  (Some of you work nights or odd hours and your "day" might be quite dark out so...)  Don't use this before trying to sleep. 

....or if you want to sleep anytime in the next few hours.   The buzz on this lasted considerably long (like over 2 hours).

Broadmoor Wellness:

Cheers!  My first mystery strain review!  And the only reason I'm writing it is in thanks for the totally awesome hybrid MJ.  (Still waiting for somebody to tell me what that was). 

Dudes, seriously, labels on containers, not on the receipts, ok?

I've already reviewed Broadmoor Wellness.  Click the Broadmoor Wellness label below this.

Granddaddy Purple from The Green House

Overall, I say a good strain and product from The Green House.  I'm interested to see if their other strains are of the same quality as the Graddaddy Purple I got.

Granddaddy Purple:

Typically, Grandaddy Purp is a smooth energetic strain.  I'm definitely getting the same effect in general I think.

I am getting dry mouth, but actually in Colorado, I don't consider that to be a bad thing.  I'm not a big water drinker.  I generally prefer soda or tea, both of which have caffeine, which actually has a dehydrating effect.  With dry mouth, I really want water above all else, nothing else satisfies it. 

At our high altitude, air is thin and the body has to be more efficient with it and needs to stay hydrated to do so.  Also, staying hydrated helps the body get rid of more toxins.  I read a study where they found that over 60% of Coloradans (I seem to remember a number like 84%) are dehydrated or borderline dehydrated.  Just don't quote me on the 84%.  It is especially important for those with disabling conditions to stay well hydrated so your body can operate more efficiently.  So what others might view as a negative side effect actually switches dry mouth from the Con to Pro side of the debate imho.

Fair amount of energy.  I'm definitely getting that "Get your Lazy Ass out of the chair and do something" aura.  I totally see some serious vacuuming in my near future.

Fog in the brain.  Wow, I'm feeling good energy in my brain but my thoughts are fogged up and easily..."SQUIRREL".  Even my vision is a little ADD.  So if you have a project you need to devote your time to, avoid this strain.  On the other hand, if its chore day, toke up and be randomly productive around the house.since you may feel like getting some stuff done, but in a very "oh, look at that clutter; I totally didn't notice it before" way.

Good problem solving if you can stay focused on it.  If you happen to get distracted doing one thing and sidetracking to something else entirely, you'll notice the first thing later, laugh at how easily your're getting off on tangents and finish up, no big deal.  Have something laying around hadn't figured out what to do with it or where to put it?  Say hello creative problem solving!

Don't recommend real cooking.  That's one project that could end up with dangerous consequences.  You may forget the stove is on or something.  So I recommend limiting yourself to ready-to-eat foods or having food delivered.

The Green House:

Jordyn was very nice and welcoming, but the dude in charge (I didn't get a name) merely tolerated my presence.  His customer service attitude was very superficial.  Maybe needs to work on whatever is making him edgy (paranoia, impatience, greater than thou attitude, whatever).

Their location is near Old Colorado City, so they only have off-street parking.  That isn't a big deal to me, but someone more disabled who has mobility issues might see this as important information before making the trip.  Also their building is not wheelchair accessible.  They would need to widen the interior doorways and hall.  It's one of the older victorian houses, so neat building, but in the manner of victorian houses, small halls and doorways, so not really their fault.  Maybe that something they have planned for a future project.

The dude did the weighing and took what felt like forever getting the weight right.  Five minutes of weighing is too long, especially since they had two other customers (couple of friends seemed like) waiting for me to get out of their way.  I don't begrudge him the right to muddle with it a bit until the numbers come out right, but after a couple of minutes, just give up and let the patient be on their way.  I was having a little back pain and ended up feeling very impatient.  Not a plus peoples.  Could even be dangerous with a patient suffering from PTSD who reminds me of The Hulk.

They take credit cards, so that's a definite plus.

Also, with a $75 purchase, you get a $1 gram.  That's a nice thing for someone who maybe wants to try something new, but doesn't doesn't want to invest in a large quantity yet.  Also smart of the dispensary, because if you like whatever gram you tried, you'll be more likely to come back and get more of that strain in a large amount.  Many dispensaries give free prerolls, but they taste kind of shake-y to me in general and I prefer the bud from the jar.

Overall, I think its just a matter of weighing the quality of their product against the dispensary's location and hit or miss customer service.  Not place for those with anger management issues.

On ads:

I'm a comparison shopper and love a deal, so I may put sale/coupon/discount offers or links to companies I patronize and want to share the info.  No hard sell here, just useful consumer info.  :-)

Strawberry D preroll from Levity Wellness

On Prerolls: I generally find prerolls to be more shake-y (aka more dried out than fresh MJ), but after a few days in a non-airtight container, "fresh" MJ can end up looking the same. I find prerolls to be a bit harsher with the smoke and give more of a body high then their fresh bud siblings. However, if it's free with purchase, I'll try it.

On Strawberry D (aka Strawberry Diesel) preroll from Levity Wellness:

This review is NOT being written while on this product, unlike my other reviews. There is a very good reason for that. I can't write while I'm unconscious. It's that simple.

This thing kicked my ass and put me to bed at around 5pm. I got up around 8:30pm, got a drink, went to the bathroom, and then slept until 7am.

Now, through my sleepiness and fatigue, I could tell it was giving me a good body high, but I can't really rate any kind of cerebral high because my brain on Strawberry D apparently = SLEEP.

Might be good for some of you having trouble in the insomnia department. It's worth a try.

This isn't a normal effect of Strawberry Diesel according to the interwebs, so either it's particular to Levity Wellness's strain or my experience was affected by the preroll. I don't know if I'll have a chance to grab some of their fresh bud for a comparison, but that would really be useful information for me personally, and maybe for others as well, so I'm going to work on that.

On Levity Wellness:

Nice people. Their jars were labeled with which ones they classified as sativas/indicas/hybrids and the clerk seemed reasonably knowledgable about the different strains. They take Visa/MC which is awesome for safety as I don't think carrying wads of cash is a very safe thing to do as a disabled person. I was checked out reasonably quickly. The clerk quickly measured my purchase and my non-preroll was given to me in a pharmacy bottle. Overall, a pleasant experience.

Let me also say something about their waiting area. Free drinks and munchies available to customers in the comfy waiting room is really nice. It's just NICE. It kind of covers my overall impression of the owners and their attitude about making their center very welcoming to customers.

They also had a flat screen on the wall playing Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure. I noticed and appreciated the stoner irony. George Carlin always adds humor to my day.

Again, I like my MJ in airtight containers and not from the big jar that everyone has sniffed from, but otherwise the packaging was acceptable.

On Specials and Combos

"Specials" or "Combos" with some providers just means repackaging the product in a way to promote something or get rid of whatever's not been selling or is a bit more exotic by putting items together in an exaggerated way that only saves you a nominal amount, like 10 cents. That's what most fast food places do. "Get the combo, you'll save 50 cents off your $15 order!"

The provider can honestly tell you that the price for all the items together is more than what they'll charge you, but its kind of a hollow truth because they omit how much you'll save exactly. The value of the discount doesn't jive with the big deal they're making about it.

Now, this misuse of the idea of a Sale offends me.  The transaction scenario as intended is that a disabled person comes to the provider to get their MJ to help them with their particular affliction.

This may be a person new to using MJ, who is still suffering from effects of their disability(es) and is nervous and trying their best to navigate through the information being given them, and he/she is trying to make an informed decision about which of the strains might hopefully give them relief.  So I'm saying you have someone whom you could, if so inclined, take advantage of, either by misleading him/her or having cloudy unclear information about  your MJ.

Some providers are generous and will overweigh the scale for you, either intentionally to be generous or because they're just happy to give you what you agreed to buy and a little overage isn't a big deal and they're not going to waste your time finessing it just because they dropped in a nug that was a little (we're talking maybe half a gram when buying 1/4 oz) over.

But for some providers, they set their acceptable overage very low, like 0.2 grams.  They'll drop in and take out a dozen buds so they give you as little overage as possible. 

Now, that's their right as the provider. You wanted a 1/4 and they're going to give you your 1/4, but they'll spend 5 minutes trying to get the scale to balance just right even though they have other patients waiting for their turn while you start to feel impatient.

I don't want to feel impatient with my MJ provider.  I want to feel like we're in this together, cooperating to let me acquire a product for a fair price and we can mutually appreciate having a pleasant interaction.

If a provider wants to be picky about it, then don't be lazy and prepare appropriately.  Do like SoCo MMJ does and have it all pre-weighed in containers, then you can package it in a way that is more sanitary for patient and as a bonus and you minimize your overage while not wasting the patient's time or looking like a cheap bastard.

Just giving some info and my constructive criticism.  To the providers, don't take any criticisms personally.  My desire, if you read my words about you, is that you take my opinion, evaluate it, and if its something you'd like to fix, then at least I've brought your attention to something in your operation that could be improved.  I'm a free consultant for you, so please don't take anything personally.

Mystic Gem by SoCo MMJ

Ok, so when I bought the LSD (Lemon Sour Diesel) that I got at SoCo MMJ, they happened to have a special going: 1/4 oz of Mystic Gem with a gram of hash and a preroll for $55.  Very nice special, thank you SoCo MMJ..  Their 1/4 generally start at $60.  So kudos to SoCo MMJ for real deal.

The genuine info on Mystic Gem as medicine is practically non existant on the interwebs (Lots on the seed form but none on the bud), so I really had no guidance on how Mystic Gem was going to affect me.  So here it is, the first articulated opinion of Mystic Gem, which can be ordered as a seed or bought at SoCo MMJ for however long they grow it.

Mystic Gem: 

Creativity off the chart! I mean seriously!  My frontal lobe is actually getting a nice golden feeling like it's working at 150%!   If you need to visit the idea store or have writer's block, this "side effect" will take care of that faster than Mitt Romney can "corporate raid" an honest successful business into an empty warehouse.

[Sidenote] You might notice my writing style change from post to post because I'm writing these posts while experiencing the side effects of different strains of MJ.  In the middle of  writing this post, I got sidetracked off on the topic of  Specials and essentially wrote a really long opinion about it mid-this-review.  After seeing how long it was, I decided it more properly should be in a separate post  (which you can read in a few minutes when I finish editing it and post it.)

Now, today isn't the first day I've used Mystic Gem, but since I think how I write while on an MJ strain is informative to the reader as an indication of how talkative I waited until I was on it to write my review.  As you might can tell, I'm seriously talkative.  I don't think I'd be a good listener right now for a friend because my mind is on talkative overdrive.  I'm loving words at the moment.  My brain is just seriously turned on by finding and using words.  So rock on Mystic Gem (by SoCo MMJ), savior of the frustrated procrastinating writer!  LoL  I wasn't planning on writing a review today because I wasn't trying something new, but here it is!

Heavy potency on the side effect.  Hey, you may call it a "high" but medicinally, its a side effect.

I'm not having a lot of physical energy at the moment, but that could be a side effect of the increased energy in the brain.  I still feel productive and seem to be getting things done, just not necessarily the things that I had on my agenda to do today.

Body feels good.  No spasms or pain.  So Cheers!  A quality medicinal strain if grown properly.

SoCo MMJ:

Also, bless SoCo MMJ for recycling.  They have a jar return program where if you bring back their jar when it's empty, you get a free preroll and they wash the jar and reuse it.  SoCo MMJ definitely gets the green thumb up for the quality Mystic Gem AND for their contribution of effort towards making us more symbiotic with our environment.

I've previously reviewed the Lemon Sour Diesel strain by SoCo MMJ, so if you click on the SoCo MMJ label at the bottom of this post, you can find more info about them from my previous posts.  No need to repeat myself.  :-)

Edit: Um, kind of personal, but positive effect on the libido.  That's all I'm gonna say.

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